Getting Something off my Chest

I think it was on this day in 2010 that my mom and I were at the airport, embarking on our excursion to Europe, where I saw something unique on the TV.  Thousands of people had started a new political organization called the Tea Party, and were protesting taxes, since it is tax day in America. For some reason, I found this to be encouraging.  I remembered when I was working making about 23,000 a year and 1/3 of my salary went to taxes.  Before my dad retired, half his salary went to taxes.  I don't remember what he made, but my parents do have money, so I guess the government thought they should have to pay their "fair share."  That was why I was encouraged by the protesters.  Finally, people had had enough of big government.  And they were doing the incredibly unpopular thing and making some noise about it.  

I am writing knowing that some people will be angered by my post.  But I truly believe in the rights of our country, the only country with these rights.  Right to free speech.  No other country has this.   This was a new and radical idea that our forefathers were determined to make sure that we had, for they came from a land where no one had free speech.  You were persecuted if you practiced a different religion from the state.  You were arrested if you spoke against the state.  People had to do what the government told them to do, there was no freedom.

That's why so many still come here!  That's why we are still the greatest country in the world!  Our Constitution!  Without that, there would be no anchor to hold us, nothing to keep us from folding like a stack of cards to popular opinion.  

I have never been popular.  My family has never been popular. We were seen as somewhat eccentric, my dad tooling around in his '32 Fords.  My parents never acted like they had money, but people somehow found out.  They still do.  We still get grief about it.  So it irritates me to no end when some people lump all rich people together as selfish and greedy.  That is just as bad as saying all poor people are lazy,or any other stereotype you can think of.  Why is this OK?  It is not OK!  I am tired of people judging us because of my parent's money!

They earned every cent.  My mom was poor growing up.  When they married, they didn't even have their own place to live, they lived first with my dad's parents, in a little rambler, then with a relative in the Twin Cities.  Their first home was a trailer in a trailer park.  Neither got to go to college (my dad did for one semester).  But they worked hard, saved their money, and committed themselves for provide for my sister and I a better life than they had.  

My parents are generous.  They do give.  They've helped out many people over the years.  Even my friends.  Even their bachelor neighbors.  Even strangers.  They donate to many causes, including vets and homelessness.  

I'm not saying all this thinking my parents are perfect and have no faults.  We all have faults.  But to judge a person solely based on one thing, is stupid.  Just because they are successful in this arena, doesn't mean that they don't have problems in any other arena.  No one is without problems.  No matter how good they look, how much money they have, or how talented they are at something.  

I was talking with my Bible study members the other day about how I found what I am passionate about, through trial and error.  I volunteered at a homeless shelter and food shelf for a bit, but I hated it, and I had a bad experience.  I guess I thought that's what good Christian does, help the poor.  But then I realized, every body needs God, even the rich, beautiful, and successful.  My point was I needed to find what I was passionate about, what I was good at, and what I enjoyed doing.  

I've been wanting to write on this for a long time, knowing that some people have issues with wealth.  I don't even like to say rich.  It's embarrassing, as some people judge right away and assume the worst.  What those people don't realize is that without business people like my dad, there would be no jobs and economy.  Granted, there are some really bad business owners.  My dad was one of the good.  He was fair, honest, rewarded his employees, and helped them whenever he could.  He just found something that he was good at, and worked hard at it until he got it.  He earned it.  I know some people might think well he is white, it's easy for him.  No, it wasn't.  I don't delude myself into thinking minorities don't have problems, I am a minority, I know I have problems!  But to blame those of whom don't have disabilities is ridiculous.  Although my parents are white, they had their own problems growing up, of which I won't state here as it is their private lives and not my mine to write about.  But they had nothing when they started.  Only a dream.  

I am proud of my parents.  They are the most generous people I know.  They have compassion.  They have always been there for me.  They are committed.  They didn't give up.  They persevered.  And I am blessed to have such parents that taught my sister and I the value of family, morality and money.  They are good people, and I love them.  

My Sister

My sister, Lisa, my dad, and me.

Last night I was watching Modern Family, and it was about the younger daughter, Alex, graduating from middle school.  Her older sister, Haley, was trying to encourage her to not give the speech that she had planned for the commencement exercises, which would have alienated her from everybody the rest of her grammar school life, but to give a common, popular speech.  Alex was a smart girl but not popular, while Haley was the opposite.  Even though they seem to fight all the time, Alex's older sister was still looking out for her, sharing what she had learned, and not wanting Alex to suffer any more the pain of loneliness as a socially awkward teen.

This show makes me cry sometimes, because it is so true to life.  My sister and I fought a lot too when we were teens.  We were so opposite of each other, I think we couldn't understand each other.  Even so, when my sister was severely ill, I worried so much for her.  When our parents were mad at her for breaking a rule, I felt for her, and took her side.  

I know that she worries about me.  Like when I felt my breast lumps, she worried I had breast cancer.  Whenever I struggle with anxiety and depression, I know she worries and wishes I could have it easier in life.  I know she wishes that I could live a "normal" life, whatever that means.

I chide her in her "blissful ignorance" and extreme optimism.  She believes there is someone for everyone, although I know this not to be true.  She believes the best about people until proven wrong.  She is the most giving person I know, so generous with her time and money, even though she has little of either.

Sometimes I worry she gets taken advantage of, which she does.  But I guess in the whole scheme of things, I wouldn't want her to change.  This is who she is.  Generous to a fault, not worrying about things that she can't control, doing whatever she can for her little girl, to make her as happy and successful as she can.  She is the most devoted and dedicated mother I know.

She is like her mom and her mom's mom, Grandma Lila. She is a beautiful person, inside and out. 

We are still so different.  I still am an obsessive-compulsive, she is still a free spirit.  She gives of herself freely, even though she has been burned many times.  I think she sometimes thinks she should "wise up."  But I think we need people like her in our lives.  We need people who believe the best, give the most, and shine brightly.  

I love my sister, Lisa.

Heroes

When I was growing up, these four TV programs were my favorite programs to watch.  I so loved these shows that I even had a Bionic Woman doll.  I dreamed of having special powers like these women had: the power to change things, to make things disappear, to make things appear, to do physical feats I could never do as I was so athletically challenged.

I was bullied as a child, and I 

had numerous surgeries, so I guess I felt pretty powerless in my life.  I emulated these women, these strong lead female characters that could carry a show.  

Nowadays, there are so few strong female lead characters.  I suppose that's why I liked the Hunger Games series.  I could relate to Katniss. 

I felt as lost as she did. Although I was not living in an apocalyptic world, I was battling my own enemies when as a child I felt so inept.

I guess that's why I also loved the new Star Wars movie, with Rey being revealed as a Jedi.  It makes me want to whip out my light saber and do some action!  

And finally, I am so excited about the new Wonder Woman!  I have lamented for years about how there are so many male superhero movies but so few women, or they are in the background, like Black Widow.  I don't like spiders, so why would I want to emulate one?  

This new Wonder Woman will have her own movie next year, which I am over the moon about.  It's about time they realize that female superheroes are needed for our young girls.  There are so much oversexualized females that make a big noise with no talent or morals that they have no one to look up to.  We females, who still feel powerless sometimes as we are battling our own enemies, need these strong women to relate to, to make us feel like we can conquer, and overcome the powers of evil.  We need to know that we can!

GOD IS GOD

God is God and I am not

Who am I to question Him?

He is God, He is in control

He gives and He takes away.

The master of the universe

The molder of the earth

He breathed life into creation

He shaped the heavens above.

He turned the world upside down

In the birth of His Son

All the rules changed

In the birth of His Son. For

The first will be last, the last will be first

The strong will be weak, the weak will be strong

The healthy will be sick, the sick will be healthy

The rich will be poor, the poor will be rich

Nothing belongs to me, all belong to Him

For I am nothing without Him

I have nothing without him

God wills what He wills.

He causes the mountains to rise

The valleys to lay low

The sun to shine

The clouds to rain

He causes life to live

Life to die

Death to life

Forevermore in Him

God is God.

The ADA: Then and Now

The year 2010 marked the 20^th anniversary of the Americans with Disabilities Act, a civil rights law that protects citizens with disabilities against discrimination in employment, public transportation and accommodation, and telecommunications.  As an adult with a disability, I wondered if the Americans with Disabilities Act advanced the employment status of people like me.    

In analyzing employment statistics from the Census Bureau, Current Population Survey, and American Community Survey, two factors became apparent.  First, the rate of employment advanced for those with disabilities in the 1990s, from under a quarter of to more than half of that population.  Since the turn of the millennium, that rate has receded back down to a quarter.  Second, in regards to yearly income, the disparity between the employees with disabilities and employees without disabilities stayed the same over the last fifteen years.  Increases and decreases throughout the years stayed the same in each group so that employees without disabilities earned more than $10,000 to $20,000 than employees without disabilities. 

Over the last twenty years, what did the government develop to improve the employment status of adults with disabilities?  The Internal Revenue Code provided three tax incentives for employers to hire such populations.  First, the small business tax credit provided up to $5,000 annual tax credit for reasonable accommodation purposes. Second, the work opportunity tax credit assisted those employees at the poverty level, those who collect social security benefits, and for adolescent workers who qualify.  Last, the architectural-transportation tax deduction provided up to $15,000 tax credit to remove barriers and other physical adaptations. 

In addition, if a present or prospective employee believed that he or she experienced discrimination, the person could file a complaint with the Equal Employment Opportunity Commission (EEOC).  The EEOC held records from 1997 to 2009 in regards to complaints filed with the commission.  In 1997, the EEOC received 18,100 complaints, and in 2009 they received 21,500, the highest amount recorded.  Since the amendment to the ADA in 2008 included more disabilities in its definition, that may have accounted for the higher number of complaints.  In 1997, four percent of cases settled, while in 2009, eleven percent settled.  These studies reveal the enforcement inadequacy of the Americans with Disabilities Act.

Finally, there existed private and public disability insurance plans, which included Social Security Disability Insurance and Social Security Supplemental Income.  However, these social programs may not lead to employment, for fear of loss of services or health insurance.  Also, Vocational Rehabilitation and One-Stop Career Centers already operated all over the nation.  Nevertheless, these services may not have lead to employment either, due to redundancy or delay. 

I meant this article to act as an impetus to American society to live out the Declaration of Independence, in that, “all men are created equal,” and that everyone has the right to, “life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.”  I hope the next twenty years of the Americans with Disabilities Act will become more beneficial towards those that it serves, that all peoples would be considered equal in the workplace. 

Night Driving

Night Driving

I feel like I have woken up from a fog that lasted since fall of 2014, when my beloved cat, Chocolate, died.  I didn't really think that I would have such a hard time, I thought I was prepared for his loss. But I wasn't.

I realized later that when I adopted pets and returned them, it wasn't a massive failure on my part, or to feel overly shameful and guilty.  I just wasn't ready, even though I thought I was.  

I've had pets all my life.  But Chocolate was my first and only one that I was responsible for.  The one and only that was totally dependent on me, and me on him.  This is not healthy, I now realize.  But I needed him as much as he needed me.  After he died, I was spent.  All my love and care went with him.  

Now I can think of him and not cry, now I don't imagine him everywhere in his favorite spots. 

I went to counseling that was mostly useless and a waste of my time and money.  I have had so much counseling over the years that I could probably counsel them!  I went to support groups that were anything but.  And I went on anti-anxiety meds that caused me more anxiety.

And then my dad fell.  I had my car accident.  I had a sore arm and hand for 8 months that went away as inexplicably as it came.  

Now I sit here on a gloomy winter day, a day after we had record highs, it was sunny, and I didn't have to wear a coat!  But I am happy.  Why?  Because I think I had to grieve.  And it takes time to grieve.  In fact, that's all you can do, is wait, maybe not so patiently, for the grief to be over. You have no control over it.  You can't will yourself to stop crying.  You just have to sit in your grief and wallow in it.  Not even knowing if you will ever get through it.  

I guess maybe that doesn't sound so hopeful.  But I can look back and know that God was with me.  I didn't feel Him, see Him or hear Him.  I wasn't even aware of Him during that awful time.  But in retrospect, He was there.  I guess in all the times of pain and grief in my life, I can know that God is with me.  He will not abandon me or give up on me.  Even when I screw up and make utterly bad decisions, His face still shines upon me.  And in that, I can have hope.

THE BIPARTISAN DIVIDE

During the U.S. political campaigns, I thought about how divisive both the Democratic and Republican parties are.   In the past, this division created gridlock during the legislative sessions.  In the beginning, political parties were created to ensure that government of the people, by the people, for the people would exist.  Americans choose their representatives who reflect the varied opinions that make America the democracy that it is.  So what are the two main political parties, and is there any hope that they can be united in purpose?

            The Democratic Party is the oldest, continual party in the United States.  On the political spectrum, it is center-left.  Its ideological position is social liberalism.  This is defined as favoring higher taxation and economic regulation.  It also seeks governmental business enterprises and governmental assistance of basic needs, education, and health care.  Social liberalists believe in the individual rights of people, in that they have the right to believe what they want, say what they want, and live how they want. 

            The Republican Party is also titled the Grand Old Party.  On the political spectrum, it is center-right.  Its ideological position is social conservatism.  This is described as favoring lower taxes and limited governmental assistance.  It also pursues free market and trade, and deregulation of the economy.  Social conservatives believe that there are traditional cultural values that people should adhere to for a civil society, and that the public needs to balance individual rights with the community’s interests. 

            In order for there to be unity among the representatives in government, two things must be remembered: the purpose of the branches of government, and the original intentions the founding fathers expressed in the Declaration of Independence, the Constitution, and the Bill of Rights.  The executive branch’s purpose is to lead the country and military, pass or veto bills, and make treaties with other nations.  The legislative branch’s tasks are to collect federal taxes to provide for governmental services, develop bills, and regulate the economy.  The judicial system’s duty is to interpret the Constitution in matters of law and set precedents. 

            The Declaration of Independence is a statement of seceding from the British Empire.   This document states that all men are created equal, and each has the right to life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.  The U.S. Constitution is the supreme law of the land.  Its main purpose was to create the branches of government.  The Bill of Rights is a list of amendments to the Constitution.  The most eminent are the five freedoms: religion, speech, petition, assembly, and press.   Other notable rights are right to bear arms, right to privacy, and criminal rights.  More amendments have been passed since, mainly to ensure that all American citizens, above 18 years, have the right to vote.  

            After briefly detailing the governmental branches and documents, what can we deduce from this collection of definitions?  The powers that be must protect our nation from any foe and establish diplomacy with any allies.  They are also responsible for making decisions that protect our rights as listed in the Declaration of Independence and Bill of Rights.   Our representatives’ duty is to provide for governmental services through the levy of taxes, and to keep the economy balanced.  The Supreme Court’s obligation is to make decisions based on the Constitution as a whole.  Both political parties agree with these ideals.  The only conflict they have is how to implement these ideals.  If the party members can keep in mind their main purpose, to serve the people, they can work out their differences in a nonpartisan manner.