Tuesday, November 5, 2013

Bullies

I just want to send a shout out to my family, relatives, and friends.  You have supported and encouraged me in my writing, taking the time to read my blog posts and tell me how much you like it.  That means so much I can't even express it in words.

I have been thinking of bullies lately.  I have always been an easy target, being small and an easy crier.  Usually I have no response when someone bullies me, as I still am shocked, even in my 40s, that someone would stoop so low as to do this.  But I think I know why they do this.  At least, its just a theory but something that popped into my head the other day as I was trying to figure out why some people are just plain mean.

I think a person who bullies is someone who feels powerless.  So they have to abuse someone that they see as smaller or weaker than them.  We see this all the time as we find out that kids who bully come from violent homes.  An adult who feels powerless finds power in abusing a child or an animal.  Men who feel powerless abuse their wives.  They may vehemently deny they feel this way, but in the end, isn't it what we all want?  To feel powerful?

I know I did.  I wanted to be like Wonder Woman or the Bionic Woman.  They were powerful and could beat the crap out of anybody who dared cross them.  I wanted to fly like Wonder Woman or leap tall buildings like the Bionic Woman.  I wanted to stop those bullies but had no idea how.

Of course, not all people from violent homes become violent themselves.  And not all bullies are from violent homes.  Then why?  Why do they feel powerless?  I think we all just feel powerless.  And then we all deal with it in different ways.  Some lash out, some hold it in, seeking comfort in food, drugs, or alcohol. 

Life is just plain scary.  I learned this from day one.  I was born with something I didn't want.  Then I had surgeries I didn't want.  Then I was bullied in school with teachers who did nothing to stop it. And on and on and on.  We all have our stories to tell about feeling powerless.

I guess that's why I firmly believe in God and the Bible.  He is the One who has power over all of this and more.  And sometimes I need to know that so much, to know that there is a reason bad things happen, even if I don't have an answer; at least I know that God is in control. 

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

HI Amy,
I wasn't sure if this is the place to comment. I agree with your theory that bullies want to feel powerful. I also think these folks are insecure, and by bullying others they feel they are better in some way to disguise their insecurity. There are many bullies out their kids and adults alike. A strong faith will get us through. Take care.